Proud Daddy

Photo Link

Okay, I know this is a cheap way to do this, but I just have not had time to wade through all my pictures to pick some to post! So, I am just going to post a link to the whole album. Unfortunately that means YOU have to wade through them to get to the cute ones, but at least you can see them until I get them sorted enough to post them properly. I've never done it this way, so I don't even know if it will work, but here goes...

Twins Snapfish Album

Sickness...

We woke up on Wednesday at 2:30 a.m. to Elianna barfing all over her bed. I panicked and ran out to the living room, leaving Chad to deal with it so I wouldn't get near the germs! (Good-bye to yet another Mother of the Year award...) He called in to work the next day and she continued to be pretty sick. So far, though, Selah hasn't gotten it, although it's only been a day or two so I am not getting my hopes up. (Both Chad's parents haven't been feeling well either.) I have tried to steer clear so I don't get exposed to it, but I'm not sure if that is wishful thinking!!! Not only do I not want to get sick, more importantly I don't want to expose the boys to anything that would set them back. Argh!!!

Some progress!!!

Closing the incubators seems to have done the trick! Both babies have taken a full bottle by mouth and both have gained weight! Micah, in fact, has hit 4 pounds and Levi is weighing in at a whopping 5 pounds 10 ounces! (He's a giant in NICU-land.) Unfortunately, the doctors said that since he is that big, he really needs to have his incubator open so he can try to regulate his own temp. So, as much as he likes to take the easy road in life, they opened him back up to the fresh air today. (Is he going to be my passive, unmotivated child?) ;0) It is always exciting to see forward progress. Let's keep fattening up, boys, so you can come home!

Day 12 - Nothing New!

Well, it's been about the same from day to day. I spend most of the day here at the hospital with the boys, while Grandma and Daddy tag-team the girls. The most I can do in the way of care (besides the endless pumping, which I hate) is give them sponge baths (can't wait for the cord to fall off!), change diapers, attach or unhook the feeding tube, kangaroo (skin-to-skin cuddling), and occasionally infuriate them by offering them a bottle. They don't understand that until they take food by mouth they can't go home! Right now, it's just too much work for them. They opened their incubators for a day and a half, but I noticed that only made them more tired, less likely to even attempt the bottle, and their weight started going backward. So, I talked to the docs and we have them back in their ovens baking. They suspected Levi was having heart problems, since he was showing signs of a constricted aorta, but the rest of his tests came back yesterday and his heart is A-OK. Both babies are still having apnea episodes, especially Levi, but they are not getting worse or more frequent. Someone needs to explain to them that breathing is not one of those things you can just forget to do.



I am feeling a bit better, and am able to drive myself to and from the hospital. This makes things MUCH easier!!! Unfortunately that also means I had to stop taking my pain meds (the last thing we need is for me to get arrested for DUI of narcotics...), so I am still pretty sore in the morning and late at night when I get home. I have settled into a routine, but the time seems to d-r-a-g by so slowly. I can't believe it's only been 12 days they've been in NICU, since it feels like weeks. Thanks to those who have popped in to keep me and the boys company! The days get long and a bit boring, so it's nice to have someone to chat with. I also appreciate those who have been understanding when the boys were having a rough day and I had to say "No thanks" to a visit. Overall they are doing very well, but some days are harder on them than others. Just know that I appreciate it either way!!!

Touchdown!

Grateful

I can't believe we made it through our first week! It went by so slowly it feels like it's been a month, but as I recover from the delivery and am getting my health and strength back (too slowly for my taste!!) it will get easier... I hope. The boys are still hanging in there - not really making progress but at the same time not battling anything really serious. At this stage, we are praying for the "big four," which are:
1. Regulating their own body temperature
2. Being able to take feedings by mouth instead of tube
3. No heart rate decels or apneas (breathing stops)
4. Consistent weight gain.

Levi has taken a couple feedings at least partially by mouth, but he has been spitting up quite a bit so they put him back on the tube feedings to cut back on his gas. Micah still can't quite figure out the whole sucking/swallowing/breathing thing, and if he does give a few sucks, he generally just chokes and spits it all out. They tried opening their incubators for a few hours, but neither were able to stay warm, and since they were losing a bit of weight they decided not to have them waste calories staying warm when they need to grow and gain weight. So, we are 0 for 4 at this point, but it's only been a week so that is not surprising. Micah also has a terrible diaper rash from the fortifier they put in his milk, so he spends his days with his bare bum in the air, poor little guy. The skin has completely come off and it just oozes blood... ouch!!!! Overall, the doctors say they are doing well, though, and that we just have to be patient and let their little bodies catch up.

As tired and overwhelmed as I get, I can't help but be grateful as I watch the dramas unfold in the babies around us. Watching parents cry when the doctors tell them there's nothing more they can do, seeing a mom hold her baby's hand for potentially the last time before they take her away for a risky surgery, hearing a baby wail in pain for hours even while on morphine... it's a highly emotionally charged atmosphere to say the least. I can't help but wonder what we could have faced if the boys had been born when they originally thought, five weeks sooner than they were. There is another set of identical twin boys with a similar condition as ours, born at 28 weeks, and they are on their third month in the NICU and struggling with many health challenges, some probably long-term. I know God would have given us grace, but I can't help but be thankful He chose to spare us the pain I've seen the other parents go through.

Tired

I am officially tired. It is very hard to stay committed to pumping when it means never sleeping for more than three hours. With Selah, I just snuggled up and let her nurse, but with pumping you have to get up, set it all up, clean up afterward, write out labels for the containers, then try to sleep for another couple hours before starting all over again! Ugh. But, as I mentioned before, this is one thing I can contribute when I feel so helpless to help them get better. So I'll whine about it, but I'll still do it. Couple this with getting to and from the hospital, spending all day at the hospital, fighting with our insurance, all while weaning off pain meds... I just need lots of prayer right now! I am SOOOO thankful we are staying with my in-laws, so I don't have to arrange child care while I am at the hospital. It is such load off my mind knowing the girls are well cared for. (I don't think the girls are going to want to move back home!) I am able to spend a lot more time with the babies, though, because of this, and I know this will help them grow and develop... and get home sooner. Right now they are telling us they could be home within a month, but the nurses told us they never say the word "home" in NICU because the babies hear you and decide not to cooperate. So, they say "Home Depot." As feisty as Micah is, we have to be really careful around him. He's sneaky.

As for the babies, they are progressing in some areas and stable in others. They are not gaining weight consistently, but both are almost back to their birthweight. They are still having trouble staying warm, so although they opened the incubator for a couple hours, they decided not to make the babies waste calories on keeping warm when they need to be gaining weight. And of course, they have the usual preemie stuff of heart rates dipping or forgetting to breathe. One time Levi stopped breathing (for a few seconds) while Papa H was holding him, and I think Papa almost had a heart episode!! The nurse came over, leaned over Levi and said, "Breathing is not optional, young man. You have to keep doing it." I think my father-in-law's breathing took longer to regulate than Levi's. Both babies are now off their IV, which I am SOOO happy about. The fewer tubes stuck in them the better!

Pictures Coming

I know, I know, you are sick of my posts about breastmilk or telling cute stories without PICTURES. Unfortunately, I can only do pictures at home with the computer Uncle Vic thinks we've stolen. (He graciously loaned us his, which has been a LIFESAVER, but yes, we will return it soon. Wah. I will miss it!!!) Because I am so exhausted by the time I get home from the hospital, I usually go right to bed. Then the next morning I am preparing to go back to the hospital... so you see how it goes. I do intend to carve out some time to post pics soon, though, I promise!!!

Bath time and photo op!

I don't have the pictures yet, but I gave both boys their sponge bath yesterday. (Daddy was able to give Levi his first bath, but this is the first time I've felt well enough to do them.) Wow - you don't get the feel for how TEENY they are until they get naked! (Well, down to the diaper anyway - they are boys so I have to learn to be careful... ) Their little hands and feet are just too perfect. Cyndi took a video, and she will (I hope!!) be posting it on her blog.

The first photo op was adorable. The nurses found coordinating U of M caps so we could take their FIRST picture together! Levi was annoyed, since his hat was tight, but I told him to get used to it. He doesn't realize what a picture fiend mommy is!